Thank you @East17.

I got caught up in feeling special. I couldn't believe that someone like him would want to be friends with me. I was well aware of the rules and believed I would be an exception. He's been a therapist for 35 years and will retire in the next couple of years so I don't think he's too concerned about breaking the rules. Or maybe he is and that is why he's holding back. I don't know.

I do know that you are right. It's painful to think about cutting ties with him because he's the only therapist who wasn't afraid of me. And I feel like I owe him so much. But I know I won't be able to fully live my life if I remain attached to him.