I am sorry you are bearing this heavy burden. How heartbreaking.
Hopefully other members here will have some good ideas for you for I am at a loss.
During my working years I was a high paid advertising executive and quit to take a very low paying job shelving books at a public library because of my mental illness. So I am the last person on earth to advice.
I do want to tell you that I think I have a little bit of understanding of what you might be going through and that my heart goes out to you. Sure hope you find something that works for you!