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nonightowl · Aug 08, 2023 at 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Motts

snip:

I don't think you are too 'sensitive.' Gaslighters use that to undermine their victim's self-confidence. Usually, gaslighters view emotionally available people as a threat to their own emotional vulnerability; a threat because they have chosen to repress whatever trauma they experienced as children from their parents growing up.

Sorry to read that you're in this unvalidating kind of relationship with your husband.

Thanks for talking about someone's own trauma from their OWN parents.

This hits home with me, as both of my parents were emotionally unavailable or immature, hence calling ME "too sensitive" like it's a flaw. So, whether man or woman, if gaslit this way growing up, it will pass on to the next generation unless a conscious effort is made to stop it. I read the analogy that it's like a multi-car pile up on the freeway.

I agree with Motts, that I too am sorry you have that kind of thing with your husband.

Of all people to have ideally emotional closeness with it, it would be one's spouse or partner.

Anyway men are told to "man up"......I'm hoping my generation is better than my parents' generation, hence raising a generation of more emotionally available men. And they in turn raise their sons, etc.