Hello all, been a long time since I posted here. Everything's been so stable that I kinda forgot what not felt like. But here I am, slipping and trying not to slip, leaning on the meds and trying to not let the late evening gloominess spread. I seem to do fine during the day, but as evening creeps around, those self-derogatory thoughts start oozing their way into everything and I just feel so useless and burdensome. I know those are pathways to very dark places, but it take so much effort to push back against them; like cold molasses coating everything.

Its odd because most of the news and events of the past few months has been positive stuff, but its just not making a solid dent in the color of my thoughts. So tired... Its been years since I've been in this state of mind, feel defenseless almost. Really, I just don't have time to entertain this thing, but I don't think its asking permission.

Anyone successfully fight these things off, I don't have six months of leeway to wallow in the gloom!