You don’t seem to like these women that much.

The group generally meets for lunch. That’s their thing. Doesn’t seem unreasonable. You could make a list of three restaurants and whatever the majority prefers, go with that. Or, you could say I’d like to go to X restaurant and invite whoever wants to join you and just understand not everyone may come.

My feeling is that to basically scold them for being too picky and then expect them to happily join you to celebrate your birthday is probably a bit presumptuous. Doesn’t exactly set up a welcoming and friendly vibe.