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Originally Posted by InkyTinks
Has anyone achieved complete Integration of all alters?
It seems to be the goal of most DID therapies but some of our 'insiders' don't want to and we see the advantages of letting some remain separate?
We have managed to integrate smaller fragmented parts or ones that maybe came out a couple of times many years ago and have been dormant since anyway.
But some are very distinctly different individuals who have had periods of hosting for several years, have their own identity and nicknames in the outside world too or come out regularly to do what they want as themselves, they have no wish to be integrated.
We have a 'social mask alter' that deals with official appointments/social events and matches the paperwork of the legal identity and the others that tend to come out when home alone...which is most of the time being housebound with ME and arthritis too now.
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my suggestion is talk with your treatment provider. for only you know how and why a part of you wants to remain in clinical distress experiencing all the symptoms, problems and behaviors that come from being mentally ill (in other words dissociated / not integrated.
your treatment provider can also explain to you the reality of what dissociation and integration is, and how the brain physically and mentally functions, beyond what you can find in media-based ways (aka in books, movies, social media, forums and groups) some of that you may already know for you stated in your post.....
"We have managed to integrate smaller fragmented parts or ones that maybe came out a couple of times many years ago and have been dormant since anyway." (quoted from your post)
for me there was no struggle and strife over deciding to integrate or not. but I did wonder at one point about how so many in media-based ways (movies, books, social media, forums groups and so forth) had a choice.
I thought about writing a detailed post about that and integration but instead here is something my treatment provider asked me to do....
she asked me to sit in a dark room and not let my brain integrate anything....
dont take in anything though my sense of sight, sound, smell, taste, no talking or making any vocal or otherwise noises, experience not a thing, no emotions nor physical sensations or touches. not even that itch on my nose. no thoughts, daydreams, plans no texting or going on the internet, or anything. not even feel my heart beating and not experience taking a breath. dont let sitting there in the dark trigger anything at all, no thoughts, no memories, no emotions, no physical sensations, nothing at all.
Just sit there in the nothingness of "not integrating" anything by the brain for half an hour.
then tell her if its possible for me not to integrate. whether its possible for my brain to stop doing its normal and natural job of integrating. whether its really possible for parts of me not to integrate.
give it a try. its quite an eye-opening experience to sit in the dark for half an hour trying not to integrate anything and discovering whether the human brain really can stop integrating whats stored anywhere in it. and whether or not it is beneficial to you to not integrate.
for me integration was not a choice. the more I sat there the more active / integrating my brain, body and mind became. I also did not see myself putting up with a lifetime of clinical distress from my symptoms, problems and behaviors.
having dissociative disorders is not fun and games like media based ways make it out to be.