Earthmama, T's absence is so hard...I;ve tried so many different ways of trying to get through them..from denial of hving any feeling, to making myself think about it, and it still hurts,..but there a moments when I feel T as if she is within me and I smile and that makes me feel warm...the pain of the breaks dont' get much easier for me after these yrs, but I guess the feeling of having part of her still with me has grown...