my therapist told me to write instead of becoming a dead dolly .... i always become a dead dolly when the emotions are to much.... i don't feel like i am allowed to be mad or sad. so.... today i had a memory of the giant coming into my room at night and i started feeling mad i was mad that he hurt me and i was sad because i felt like i deserved it for being a bad girl.... my therapist told me that the giant was the one who was bad but the giant was an adult how could he be bad..... i must be the one who is bad but she says no and i am very confused..... and hurt... the hurt is so deep i feel as though i will die but she sasy not to injure myself that that doesn't really help she said to write and i am terrified of my feelings afaid to write them sometimes i wish i could kill the bad giant but then who would help me when i need help. and sometimes i am mad at the mamma for not knowing it was happening but how can i be mad at her she didn't know ....so that leaves myself .... can anyone understand me .... ? so sad .....feel all alone