I have a lot of the same problems. No real friends since high school. I've been diagnosed with just about everything and as of now, I don't even know what I am diagnosed with. I'd guess it would probably be Bipolar, BPD or schizotypal with extreme social anxiety, depression and CPTSD. I've never been tested for autism but with how hard it is for me to socialize and interpret social cues, I might be. Anyway, I just thought I'd share that you're not alone with what you are going through.