Quote:
Originally Posted by Finmom18
Ok. Trying this again.
My ex suffers from depression. He broke up with me in July. Via text. Angry text. Refused to talk about it at all.
One of his exes texted him. I guess a couple times during our relationship. He didn't tell me right away. Obviously I felt hurt. Angry. Because he kept that secret. He always talked about his exes in the beginning. That issue was resolved. Until recently.
I had a hard time letting go of the issue. He is the type that likes to just brush things under the rug. I argued with him. And he broke up with me.
He always was the one to talk about a future with me. Marriage too. He told me he wanted to wear a bowtie at our wedding next year. We were never engaged. That was a week or so before he broke up with me
A few days later, he said he really didn't want a future with me and it was a bad judgment call on his end to talk about it. Then said masterbation was better than sex.
We discussed things via email. He said he did want a future with me during the relationship. But no more because of our silly arguments. And because he does not have sexual chemistry with me. Said he is interested in sex but he doesn't crave it with me.
That was hurtful. Very painful. I told me how hurt and angry that made me. He also said he blocked my number because me trying to get answers from him was not good for his mental stability. And said it's not good for either of us to continue to discuss the relationship.
I have a feeling his depression has spiralled. I love him with all my heart. I need help
1. How do I tell him that I love him and will be there for him if he needs anything? I don't want to seem like I am pressuring him or that I am waiting around for him.
2. How do I help him? To open up?
3. Based on the above, is it possible for us to work things out? I mentioned in my email that sex is not the be all end all in a relationship and that we should have talked more and maybe went to couples therapy.
4. Should I just let him be, stop reaching out and completely remove myself and move on with my life?
Any help is appreciated.
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Hello Finmom, First off I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with all of this. My best advice, and this maybe quite difficult for you to do this... but I honestly feel that you should completely cut him from your life. If he blocked your number... please return the favor by blocking him too.. including all of his social media accounts.
Just because he has depression doesn't make it right nor does it excuse for him to trample on your heart. Unfortunately based on what you posted here.. he has zero interests in continuing the relationship with you. He's not sexually attracted to you... there is nothing there.