hey. is it possible... that your therapist hasn't changed his view at all, it is more that you are afraid that he has changed his view because before he only had access to your take but now he access to your husbands take as well? i just mean that... therapists aren't supposed to take sides. they are supposed to accept what is said with an air of critical neutrality. basically... remaining neutral on whether external events are or aren't as the patient says... just focusing on the patients feelings and interpretations etc AS the patients feelings and interpretations etc.

i think that i would have trouble seeing a person for both couples therapy and individual therapy. i would have trouble getting beyond a concern that they were taking sides and i would have trouble thinking that the therapist wasn't taking enough account of my perspective.

if the therapist is working out well as a couples councellor... then could you find another therapist for individual therapy? or could you talk to your therapist about your concerns for individual therapy?

i'm not sure that the strategy should be to firstly sort yourself out and then to secondly sort out your relationship. part of what we are (perhaps the biggest part) is sorted out in relation to others. i think both lines of attack are legitimately and equally valid...