Hi everyone.

I was posting for a while on the bipolar forum but found out I had been misdiagnosed and am not bipolar since I never had a manic or hypomanic episode.

Unfortunately I have severe anxiety and moderate depression (Atypical depression which is worse in the evenings). I have a support group in real life, but it's in the evenings so sometimes I can start feeling really negative there and venting. I will explain that next meeting just so I don't seem like a totally negative person.

I moved to a new city last year but had a very rotten experience with one person I met. It was so odd and unpleasant- she just took a real dislike to me and I still don't fully understand it but there were warning signs I ignored. I have no friends nearby and am normally quite a social person so it's hard. I am married so I do have my husband but I've always depended on having one or two close female friends as well. I would prefer to move back to a more urban area but for financial reasons that's not possible right now. Also we don't have a car yet so are basically trapped for now - there is a car shortage here and prices are astronomical. We will hopefully be able to get one in January.

Anyway, wanted to give a proper introduction. I'm trying not to slide into deep depression but it's not helping that my life is stalled while I wait for medical tests. If those are clear I may be able to get a job. My husband is older (I'm 54) and will be getting a pension but it's really not enough for us both to live on, at least not comfortably. So... I am so bored and feel like I'm in a waiting game.


TLDR: I'm dealing with worsening depression, isolation and boredom, and stress of medical symptoms that are not explained or resolved.