@Arbie I am so sorry that you are experiencing this challenge. This is certainly not your fault. The vulnerability to developing addiction problems is hereditary so it’s not your fault that your daughter became an addict. One of the things I recently learned is that individuals that have dyslexia are very prone to developing addiction problems, same with ADHD. The individuals in my own life that developed problems had these brain wiring challenges. This in no way means all those with these type of brains will be or are addicts. It just means a person is susceptible and often can manage to function despite being an active addict.

When someone is an addict their life revolves around their addiction. It is very painful for others who love the addict be it a spouse or parent or child. The addict protects their addiction so they end up living a lie and develop all different ways of denying others and themselves that they have lost control of themselves.

The very first step with AA is admitting there is a problem and that the addict is powerless and chooses the engage using. Once a person admits they are an addict but want to stop using their journey is a life long journey of living their life sober. This takes time and involves learning how to live sober one day at a time knowing that you can become an addict and lose control even with one slip.

Yes, it’s called a disease but that doesn’t mean it’s ok to be an addict and abuse family and friends through manipulation, denials and gaslighting.