Good post. I don't think trying to ''control'' our thoughts is helpful. A bad and archaic way to ''cope'' with intrusive thoughts
(but was offered to me, thanks to that..... snake/other snakes)
My FOO don't value me. They aren't better than me in fact they are so lacking in empathy and kindness that they are ...... not the ''best'' people they seem to think they are.
I also think volunteer work could be helpful, even posting on MSF (or elsewhere) offering support as CANDC mentioned.
You're ok, AS IS
(FOO - abusive ''family'' of origin)
I agree with Eskielover that not enjoying social events with people you don't like and who don't appreciate you doesn't make you in any way ''defective'' or unsociable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CANDC
@LizzieVale I am sorry you feel social situations are challenging. That must be rough.
I also find social situations challenging because I try to think of what will be an appropriate response. What does help me is to think in my mind what I would say if I saw this person posting on MSF this site and so I speak what I would normally write. It was awkward at first but it eventually comes more natural.
I think trying to control your thoughts is a way to get upset. Rather than do that I practice turning my attention to other things around me or my breathing or something else. The more I practice concentrating the less intrusive thoughts bother me.
As far as sisters and brothers go I am not the same as them and accepting that has saved me a lot of grief. I have qualities they do not have and they do not seem to value those so I had to stop comparing myself to them.
That in itself does not make the financial challenges go away but accepting myself means I judge myself less and I am more content living my life just as I am.
If you can do any kind of volunteer work, that might help in a couple of areas like getting practice in social situations without a big risk and could possibly lead to a part time paid position. If leaving the house is not possible, there are places like MSF that offer opportunities to support others. @CANDC
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