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Griffe said:

And that makes me want to cry all over again but I'm not supposed to cry

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Are you supposed to blink grigge?

Crying is similar..controlled by places in the brain that are not controlled...interesting paradox..

Crying is our valve,, a supremely wonderfully automatic one...that lets things out that have no other outlet..

You are not stupid by any strech of any imagination..you are perfectly human. A man who feels deeply and profoundly. A man who wishes it could have been different.

But history is a shadow,,,what you do now is real...and you are in the powerfull position of not passing on to your children what was heartlessly passed to you...

Enjoy the beautifull gift of Fatherhood my dear friend...

Happy Fathers Day...

Lenny