Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight
Hugs, Scarlet. I completely understand about not wanting to go to the hospital. Maybe 8 years ago (I was still seeing ex-T at the time), my p-doc was trying to push me to do an intensive outpatient program. It wasn't even full hospitalization. But it would have lasted 6-8 weeks, I think AND the big thing for me was that I wouldn't have been allowed to see ex-MC or ex-T during it. Yes, I would have had many more hours of support per week. But it would not have been with the T's I trusted (and to whom I was attached, particularly ex-MC).
So I didn't go. If I were in a situation like yours right now, I'm pretty certain that I wouldn't have gone either.
I'm really glad your H came through for you and was supportive. It suggests he'll be able to help you through L's absence.
In terms of G, with his being new, he likely didn't know what sort of support you needed or wanted. If you let him know, hopefully, he can be more helpful next time, if needed. I struggled very much with Dr. T not supporting me the way ex-MC did at first, but then as we got to know each other more, he was better able to give me the form of support I needed (though he certainly messed up badly a few times in there).
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Thank you, LT. It's nice knowing someone understands, and I'm sad that you were in that position, too.
H has really really stepped it up. Even today when I was having a breakdown at the vet, he kept me calm, told me to reach out to L or J. He even offered to stop working early tonight just to be with me.
G...we'll I wrote him telling him all that I felt went wrong. He wrote me back and acknowledged each point and even said he wishes he did things differently like reading my notes before initiating the phone call or helping me understand his mental process instead of being silent. We both agreed it was a hard situation considering that a crisis call was only our 2nd interaction outside of emails. His email was very reassuring. If nothing else, we can connect through writing.
L did respond to my text today and she'll call me in an hour. I'm trying so hard to hold it all.