I'm so sorry, you don't deserve to hear such unkindness from your mom. That you were born into this world makes you a worthy person - don't buy into any nonsense that your life isn't something precious and valuable. I know people that have been through something similar and have come out better and more loving people as the result of it, I have a feeling that since you are seeking answers that you will too! Read what ever resonates and always keep searching for answers, you will find them.