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Originally Posted by SarahSweden
I get your point but for me it´s not possible to just state what I need or what I can or can´t do at a workplace.
All those things affect me and what stops me from working at a certain workplace or similar is something that needs explanation. For that I need to have trust in the social secretary I´m talking to and I need to feel that she cares about what I´m telling her.
If I for example have been through something difficult that now affects what type of workplace I need, then it´s most probably an emotional aspect to it, perhaps a sorrow and when talking about those things, it sometimes makes me cry.
I can´t then meet with a person who thinks it´s all about stating what I can´t or can´t do at a workplace and then it´s just to proceed.
I understand that her assignment is to document what I tell her and to use that information to find a job or an internship but she won´t get that information by thinking I´ll just meet with her and state and summarize my needs.
It had been a different thing if I just needed aid like a special desk, computer glasses, a special chair and so on. Then I would agree it´s just telling her that and she could then find a company that would get that aid for me.
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Yes if your emotional difficulty either in a form of diagnosis or in a form of temporary difficulty makes it hard to work certain jobs, you absolutely could tell her that you cannot work certain jobs due to emotional difficulty.
Almost everyone who is struggling with mental illness or temporary mental/emotional difficulty, would have some troubles with certain jobs. And yes it’s fine to share how your feelings/emotions affect your ability to work.
But it seems that you want them to continue these conversations about feelings, rather than them saying, “ok how about we look into job from home situation?” That doesn’t seem to satisfy you. But that’s just how it is.
It’s ok to share why you can’t work. But I am not sure how you want the agency to engage with you. To what extent?
I also wonder if your case workers or coaches or social workers are under pressure as you haven’t worked for years. They might be pressured by their supervisor to get you a job.
There’s nothing wrong with crying when talking about sad things. Most of us do that. But how do you want them to respond? Do you just want them to say they are sorry or you want some strategies?
Have you tried books about grief? In my experience grief is very personal and we kind of alone in it as we all feel different things when grieving. I like this book “grief one day at a time”. It’s relatable.
I saw a therapist for grief counseling and found it unhelpful. My daughter on the other hand saw a grief therapist for three months during her leave from work (unable to work after losing her husband unexpectedly) and she found it extremely helpful, but she also joined a group of young widows and widowers and that helped a lot. She was able to return to work. So everyone is different.
What have you tried? You often speak of what you expect others to do for you. It doesn’t always work. What do you think you could do to get into a better place and improve your life? I know sometimes nothing works but you might want to try somethjng