No one said they are blaming you for your illness, scientists have found it to be genetic in about 99% of people. There are various degrees of this illness that can be treated, what I stress to all, including myself (I am bipolar also) is to keep with treatment, if a med fails, a good pdoc will have you try new or different ones.
It is time to change pdocs when a person has honestly followed all directions, even hospitalization and has found no improvment. There is no miracle cure, one has to commit to following the course of treatment without any deviation.
I understand fully how you feel right now, I've been there, and I also felt in the begining of my illness, meds., etc.
that the pdoc and therapist were full of crap, as time went on I realized they were right, and I continued with treatment. I must say that while seeing my present and a drop to visit my former pdoc, I felt I wanted another pdoc's
opinion, due to the fact I still needed convincing that they were right, and their recommended meds were right, the conclusion was that they were right about the DX and suggested meds. I had different ones tried, but my final med has been successful. What I am saying is do not give up, remember you are worth giving yourself the chance to heal, unfortunately it just doesn't happen over nite.
My brother took 7 to 8 years to heal, it has been 33 years now that he has been in total remission and takes maintenance (sp?) meds.
I think it would be in your best interest to listen to some of us here and hold back on being on the defense, there are many people here that care about you and are able to share their experiences and/or their support.
Please take care,

DE