I don't feel well today. Partly depressed and partly struggling with pain in one of my knees. It is slippery outside, so all in all I think that I am afraid to go outside (afraid of breaking a leg).

I was sitting here holding breath and wanted to take a benzo. Then I reminded myself that a benzo was not a good solution. Instead I said STOP and focused on my breath and on comforting myself. I have now found out that I can go outside bringing stingers to use if I need them.

It is strange how small problems can have an effect on our psychological health and how it can make us blind for solutions for a while.