First: If your therapist were to pass away, while you're still seeing them, would you want to attend their funeral? And do you think you'd actually attend? Assuming you knew about it in time, obviously.

My T has said that part of his informing clients of his passing would be info on his funeral and letting clients know they're welcome to attend. This surprised me a bit--that he'd include that info.

I do feel I'd want to and would attend. Though I'd stay in the back and not go through like the receiving line (or whatever it's called at a funeral). If someone there asked how I knew him, I'd probably give some sort of vague "professionally" answer (and they could draw their own conclusions).

I think it would help me process the loss. Note that I've now been seeing my T for 6 years. If it was someone I'd been seeing under a year, or at least under 6 months, I don't think I'd attend.

In the other direction: If you passed away (while still seeing your therapist, or not long after terminating), would you want your T to be informed about and attend your funeral?

I feel I'd want this. My T today said he has attended client funerals before (though some he's learned about too late). And that he'd go to mine if I wanted him, too. He seemed to think I seemed ambivalent about it. But I explained that it was more that I felt sort of awkward saying I wanted that, like hoping he'd care enough about me to spend a couple hours of his day honoring my life. He seemed to understand.

Of course, I hope neither of these scenarios will be an issue in the foreseeable future (I'm in my mid-40s, and he's in his early 50s). But I do think it's good, in a way, that we discussed it.