I'm currently trying to seek my passion at college. Although, it feels more like eating a food, not liking the taste of it, but then getting acclimated and starting to like it over time. If that makes sense...Basically, I didn't originally want to go to college to study what I'm studying, but I failed in what I was actually passionate about before, so it's supposed to be a new start. I do notice that sometimes my father will ask me why, if I'm so grateful, why I'm so upset. I've really tried, but I just have no idea why. He thinks I don't want to tell him and that I'm trying to be difficult for some reason. But in reality, I hate leaving him and myself guessing about why I'm struggling with this. If I could just stop feeling that way or make myself know the answer and tell him, I would. Everyone in my family are doctors who are extremely successful. They're all about being healthy and living your best life and all that. So I do feel pressure to be like that all the time too. It feels like this horrible secret that I just know I'm not like them, and not only that, I struggle with things like depression...I hope I can be real and honest with them one day