Thanks. I know it’s not my T. She’s the best I’ve had and mostly I’m very attached to her. It’s weird that I can know this but I still feel like I hate her. It’s a familiar feeling actually and something I know is worth exploring.
The problem is that I know I intend to explore it and that means working with T and when she accepts it and connects with me (which part of me wants) it will make the hate go away and hating her right now makes me feel the best I have done in a long time and I don’t want to lose that.