Very dark and rainy here, which is depressing.

I woke up last night at 4AM and couldn't get back to sleep - and realized I can't move on with my life until my health issue is resolved. I had hoped to get off disability and get back to work by now, but a new health issue has appeared and it's not something I'm willing to just wait and monitor. So, I need to pursue more tests, treatment and options. I'm SO disappointed. But I know someone who had a similar issue and it turned out to be cancer, and I know that waiting can mean the difference between life and death.