You deserve to find a loving, supportive partner but I've realized this is a HUGE task especially when people are over 30 or 40. I'm not sure I would ever look for another partner if anything happened to my husband. I'm just too jaded from hearing stories of charming yet selfish individuals who expect to take more than they give in a relationship. I wonder if there are non-Internet dating agencies that do background checks to verify someone's career, education, and criminal record check and so on. Too many liars, gold diggers and cheaters out there.


Personally I would try not to exclude a man just because he's not part of your music scene - some men may be open to new experiences. I always thought I would NEVER date a man who wasn't a big fiction reader because that is so important to me, but then I met my husband who literally can't read much due to his disability but likes other forms of fiction like TV series. Now he has gotten into audio books. Shared values may be more important than shared interests.


I remember when I started dating my husband I did a "pop psychology" test where I asked him his favourite animal and 3 things he liked about them. He said dogs because they are so loyal. People tend to project the traits they value in themselves. I soon realize he himself is very loyal and would never cheat on me. After the former guy I dated, this was so refreshing.