My husband wants more weapons. Self defense to protect me. He looks at the news multiple times daily. I have stopped focused on my continued recovery. I told him to get something so he would feel more at ease. I do not agree with him on this but I cannot change him. What did occur was I asked him about future possible car repairs. He then got upset blaming me for doing something to sabotage his plans. I meant no such thing. I am just trying to be careful get our real needs met first. Black and white thinking is a cognitive distortion. I try not to engage. I did de escalate by refusing to argue doing emdr session meditating and listening to a podcast on complex trauma and addiction. I did tell him all I am comfortable with is my stun gun. I asked him what happens if it does not fall apart. He said what if it does. I then replied then I die. He says he will not. How do veterans get like this? I now about trauma and recovery too. Unrealistic expectations are a huge red flag. For yourself and from others