Everybody's different, but I'll tell you as an alcoholic if I went through a family function without drinking and someone commented on it my first thought would be "What you didn't think I couldn't" and then I would proceed to go back to my old ways because that's how everyone looks at me and no matter how hard I try I'll probably never change their mind or repay the debts (monetarily and otherwise) I owe them.
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"I don't know what I'm looking for."
"Why not?"
"Because...because...I think it might be because if I knew I wouldn't be able to look for them."
"What, are you crazy?"
"It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet,"
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