I’m sorry Starling it sounds like you have situational anxiety and depression and no place to vent it.

You are still connected to a man that is drug dependent and still very selfish. Unfortunately, even though he is at a distance he still has a connection to what should be your sanctuary. You know deep down he wants a piece of it and he can make things very challenging.

I had to deal with that kind of challenge with my older sister and her need to have very unhealthy control over my parents. That lasted for too many years and it wore me out and reeked havoc on my nervous system.

It’s hard when a toxic person that needs a high and has mood swings can affect not only you but your children too.

Have you ever attended an alanon meeting? Sometimes being around others that you can vent to that understand can help.