I am sorry...

it is so hard to be a parent sometimes... to know what to do.. to keep trying when you get so discouraged.. especially with that age group..

my suggestion... might "shock" you.. and I truely mean no harm...

I have a son 23.. who is ADHD... and at the 19 year age.. drank a great deal... partied.. hardy as they say..it was a tough time.. he is just now "coming" out of that...and still has trouble with his ADHD..

The bi-polar concerns.. me.. if he is getting the correct treatment - I mean this.. considering financial concerns.. because I have been there.. please believe me..and finding money for medical things.. can be pretty impossible....

Sleep apena.. can also.. make a person very legargic...

so.. my suggestion.... is to apply for SSI for your son - or have him do it... that I believe would give you.. state help.. like Medicaid... and.. would perhaps... get the medical issues taken care of...

the question of tougher verses fair... is something I am still working on...

(((hugs)))