Wow thanks for everyone's responses and input and advice. I really appreciate your support.

Today was a terrible day. After I overheard the female lawyer was speaking to her supervisor (another partner in the law firm) about her meeting with me and the other male attorney. Now granted, that's not a problem. It only becomes a problem if the person they're talking about OVERHEARS them - which is what happened today. The female lawyer told me that I could knock/open her door if I needed her, even when her door was closed. So, as I went to open her office door, I overheard her telling her supervisor (another law firm partner who KNOWS my cousin, another attorney!!) about how "I don't that what I told Motts sunk in. I don't think she gets it." Etc. etc. I was ****ing floored. Their previous legal assistants QUIT (I think ) because they were left alone with zero training with regard to supporting this female attorney and the other male attorney.

The issue then becomes, did I eavesdrop intentionally? Did I wait 30 seconds by teh door listening b/c I heard my name? No, and yes. I heard that awful female attorney betray my trust and my confidence, the way she bashed me to her supervisor. Granted, what other people say about me is none of my business ONLY when it doesn't impact my job. But she is one of my two supervisors. If she thinks I"m a bag of ****, yet the day before tells me she thinks I'm doing great...what am I more likely to believe when she speaks out of both sides of her mouth? I went to one of the founding partners and shared what I overheard. At first she was sympathetic and gave me positive feedback about how well I'm doing being so new. Then, an hour later after speaking to her fellow law firm partner and that horrible female attorney, changed her tune and gaslit me focusing on my eavesdropping meaning that I lack character and that i misunderstood the female attorney's perspective. ********. The female attorney got caught trash talking her own employee and rather than show me respect by apolozing, she and the male attorney went on with their day as though I was invisible. And I had to endure a ****ing office christmas party right after that conversation with the founding partner.

No workplace environment is 100% toxic-free. I know this. I was caught off guard and had I not said anything, my job would still be in jeopardy of being terminated anyway since that female attorney's true feelings are that she doesn't respect me or even think I am capable. It took every ounce of strength for me not to quit on the spot b/c I need that paycheck. Sure, I could quit and rideshare drive full-time. I could make the same if not more driving 8 hours that i do sitting there taking on that toxic female attorneys' bullying for the ****** pay of $40K. Do I regret my actions speaking to the founding partner? Hell no I'm 52. I have no time for ********. They are grown adults. The fact that the snarky other law partner and that female attorney made zero effort to apologize to me speaks volumes. I'm not mad that they were conferring behind closed doors. I'm disappionted and disgusted that they literally don't care about the way they treat their hourly staff at this law firm. Maybe all law firms are toxic as ****. Maybe I have no business working for anyone in an office setting (as my work history reflects) and should just go do my rideshare driving and be happy with that.

Maybe I should have pursued an entirely different path void of corporate America and any office work. I am disgusted that two women in leadership roles, could be so ****ing catty and such bullies. The male attorney offered me a cookie made by the female law firm patner who is the supervisor of the female attorney. I threw it in the garbage when he wasn't looking. I don't know if he offered the cookie to me knowing the whole context of the situation although the founding partner told me she spoke with him and with the female attorney, who deflected attention off of her ****** behavior towards me, by crying and acting hysterical according to what the founding law firm partner observed during her conversations with them both. The same way a naughty child who got caught doing something bad, deflects attention away from themselves by throwing a tantrum. A trantrum is a way to distract them from being held accountable for their behavior.

Everyone left before 5 p.m. and it was just me, the female attorney and her paralegal, and the firm admin who threw the office christmas party. The female attorney pretended I didn't exist when her paralegal was with me showing me how to do a task. She just stood at my cubicle, speaking to her paralegal like I wasn't even there. That seems very emotionally immature to me. What i wish would have happened (1) I never heard her trash talk me (2) she at least respected me enough to apologize after the fact (nope, that definitely didn't happen) or (3) her supervisor apologized to me (nope). Im a legal assistant so I don't matter. My feeings are moot. I'm a peon.

I will be SHOCKED if I'm not fired by tomorrow. Shocked. I reached out to a previous temp agency recruiter who I actully like (I know, crazy, considering how much disdain I have for the recruiters in my past). She said, "I GOT YOU!" so, I hope to god she finds me something! My goal: find a new job within the month of January and one that is full-time, while I put up with the toxicity at the law firm unless they fire me tomorrow. I deserve to be treated with respect. I don't confront anyone. I show up and do my job and go home. I don't incite office drama for attention. I just accidentally lingered outside my supervisor's door when i heard my name and her saying terrible things about me. I felt betrayed. Disrespected. Hurt. What should I have done? Walk away and get a thicker skin and play the part while I look for another job secretly? Too late for that one. Secret's out. Yes, I know pride comes before a fall. It was prideful for me to stand there and eavesdrop yet at the same time, I felt like it was a turning point that meant this job was not for me. I made it this long and then BOOM this happened and now I'm possibly being fired and back in dire financial straits. I can't believe the attorney who knows my cousin, would act like that with me. Makes no sense. What the hell did he say to her about me? I wonder.

I am applying for other jobs after work hours too.

Everything is income based in my county and city. I lost my SNAP benefits b/c of my job. I lost my medical assistance bc of the income guidelines. So I have to reapply for the other tier of county medical care UCARE which means I make monthly payments towards it. Also, some food shelf intake forms rquire you to fill out how many times you've visited that food shelf. Most food shelfs limit their attendance; one near my apt only allows you to visit it 2 times before you are restricted for 5 months before you can visit it agian. Lots of arbitrary rules with food shelves. Another food shelf won't allow people who have SNAP to use it, for example. Rock and a hard place, food shelves. Not available to everyone like its believed. Nope.

I have to figure this out. I have to land on my feet. I have to be successful. What do I do?