L told me that we have decades... Not as a promise, but as an intention. I'm going to choose to believe that that is still her intentions. If I have to deal with future leaves, well, I guess I get to suffer future leaves. I'm 4.5 years invested into this relationship/journey. And it's not just what L does for me, but who she is. No one is perfect. I still don't think it's fair that she fostered dependency and attachment when she was planning on multiple pregnancies. I will be miserable and probably suffer each one...maybe...idk.

I'll have my session with L next Thursday, so maybe she'll have more answers for me? And I'll see T on the 3rd, so I can discuss this with her, too.