I would agree with this, at least on some level--particularly considering the "with the opportunity to process" aspect.

For example, Dr. T has said/done some things that have been very painful for me--one thing late last year, around his reaction to my saying I loved him, I felt was retraumatizing in a way (because of what had happened with ex-MC and my high school teacher in the past--which he very much knew about). I had the thought to myself a few times "Why am I staying with him if I'm just going to feel pain from things he say/does?"

However, over the past year, at various points, we've revisited the "love thing" (as we call it). We have both come to a greater understanding about the other's reaction and feelings surrounding it. And I've found that to be healing in some ways. It was an opportunity I didn't fully have with ex-MC (because he put barriers up--yes, I understand why he did, but it kept me from working through what happened) and didn't have at all with the teacher. And an opportunity I didn't have with a few other people in my past, like exes or friendships that ended (a few, I was able to process with later).

Bringing this back to you, Scarlet, it could be valuable and, ultimately, healing for you to work through some of this with L when she comes back (and I know you're meeting with her soon, too, but I imagine this is a longer process). It could help you to, for example, express anger at her and tell her you feel abandoned, traumatized, etc., and have her still be there and accept all that and empathize. To realize someone can go away and then come back (which can be difficult for those of us, myself included, with abandonment issues). But the relationship and caring and support and connection are still there (even if it may take some time to really feel that).