Hey everyone. It's been a little while since I've dropped by. My counselor asked me today if I had tried finding an online bipolar support group which reminded me I should probably get back in the habit of visiting this website on a regular basis. I think I stopped because I was sick of (well still am) dealing with my emotions, including the bipolar symptoms since I seem to be treatment resistant. Some trauma wounds have been seriously triggered lately so that has me pulling away from others (physically and emotionally) as well. Without putting the burden on me, my counselor has pointed out she thinks a second opinion may be needed because she does not feel she is meeting my needs. I will admit I have been backsliding in a lot of ways in these last few months. She called me an anomaly so that was fun...

I also had to leave a message for my pdoc today because me taking an extra .5 mg prn of risperidone for a couple of days has led to needing it every day and still experiencing some manic symptoms. When I try to go back to just .5 mg, the symptoms get worse again so I asked him if I should either up the dose again if things get worse again or schedule an appointment earlier than the one I have scheduled for January 3rd. His nurse left me a voicemail during my counseling session saying she had his response to my question and that I can call back tomorrow. I've never had that happen before-I either answer the call or the voicemail is all that is needed so I'm curious why I need to call again.

Since their system is to leave a message on the nurses line and then either her or my pdoc calls me back, I'll have to leave another message on the nurses line. Even though the audio recording says her hours no longer include Tuesdays, this is the line she told me to call. So, I'm curious how that will all play out. Oh well. I'm sure I'll end up back in his office at least once between now and New Year's.