Yes, I know loneliness has a lot to do with it.
I am going on dating sites and no one compares. It is as though when I swipe through profiles I am almost looking for him to appear. I also feel guilt because I did things to hurt him afterwards knowing I could never have him.
Even if I did have him, he would cheat on me! Just like he does his wife and everyone else.
He was my friend and we had something that was special to me. I don't have much in my life. I just thought maybe doing something, not sure what, that could get me over this hump and restart my life.