@wheeler this is a good question: why is it important that therapists care?

If a therapist did not care their mind may be elsewhere and they would not be really helping you.

On the other hand, their caring is not the same as a parent. They do not want to be the object of the client projecting parental conflicts onto the therapist. They also want to avoid the possibility of transference or responding to romantic fantasies the client may have about the therapist. Basically they want a professional relationship with their client, so their caring is more of a professional caring.

If a therapist wants a personal and or romantic relationship with the patient, then this is a giant red flag. Ask them to stop and start looking for another therapist. If they are way out of line you may want to report their behavior to a professional associations therapists belong to. They prohibit those.

No good comes out of a therapist that is romantically involved with their clients. Even meeting outside of appointments is a red flag. @CANDC