So, the firm went to a local restaurant for its Christmas party from around 12:30-3:30 p.m. I walked with the other 2 new hires to the restaurant b/c the clique of mean girls (aka paralegals) didn't wait for the three of us.

The mean girls all sat together so the 3 newbies (myself included) sat at a table.

I actually sat between one of the two original firm founders and the firm administrator. The firm founder was very nice to me; he's friends with my attorney-cousin. We chatted about trivial things throughout the luncheon and without any prompting from me after he asked me who I support, advised that the area of law I support is very complicated and that mistakes are allowed.

Encouragement from the firm's original co-founder: 1 of 2 men, directed at me to stop being a perfectionist. I'll take it. (I need to get over myself when people are genuinely being nice to me, and my cynical-side assumes they have bad intentions but he didn't have any intentions...just making conversation with a new employee b/c he's sat next to me).

The company Christmas party was weird for me because I don't know if I'll even be at this firm next year. To have expectations that I am seems unrealistic and a bit delusional.

When myself and the two new hires left together, the clique of mean girls all shouted the other two women's names but not mine. Pretty sure I know the reason why (see my other thread). Office gossip. Why people quit or get fired from their jobs. Creates a toxic workplace.

I should be allowed to ask for help without retaliation at my workplace. But that's just not possible. Brene Brown's altruistic philosophy that it's powerful to be vulnerable doesn't account for the fallout afterward. How people recoil and cringe and retaliate when a coworker is being vulnerable and asking for their workplace rights to be valued and protected. None of Brown's books or TedTalks address that directly which is why I'm not a fan.

Anyway, sorry for that tangent.

I think it's wishful thinking to assume that any/most workplaces have policies that shut down retaliation and protect the worker.

Should I assume that the firm's co-founder's 25 year friendship with my attorney-cousin is a card I could play in the near future, if further shenanigans occur as far as retaliation against me for speaking up against one of my attorneys for their toxic behavior?

Still going to keep applying for other jobs.