Two tears later and nothing has changed. What if it never gets better? I get worse every day. I would have ended my life long ago but I cannot do that to my kids. They are grown now and I hardly get any time with them. I am grateful that they are doing so welll, at least. My mind never stops terrorizing me. Not one aspect of my life is comforting. I have no sense of security, no hope. I fight so extremely hard and do so much work but nothing changes. The constant fear, worry, and despair are unbearable.