I really hate that both of have had such difficult marriages and the way the ended.

My ex wife and I were together for nearly 4 years and married for 3 and I was totally blindsided by her wanting a divorce. I feel like the last 4 years of my life were a lie. I don't know where to go from here and having 2 young children makes things even worse. I tell you, I think divorce is probably harder on men most of the time if there's children involved because the children end up living with the woman and it just sucks not having my children around like I want.