Christmas was a weird experience. I was on my own for most of it. I went shopping, went to lunch and went to mass all by myself on Christmas Eve and I couldn't stop the tears. It's been really hard, because I was feeling haunted, especially the other night.

There was a breakthrough this morning where my husband's message sounded more accepting of the situation, basically thanking me for everything and to call him some time, and he didn't call back. That helped a lot, because it has been starting to hurt less.

Despite two of my friends ditching me today, today was a good day. I got dressed up went to see my parents and had a nice evening on the phone with one of my best friends. We watched Fred Claus together.

My life is full of riches, and I am going to be more appreciative. These ups and downs are sort of nuisance really, but hopefully with a good sleep again tonight like last night, I can get through it. I am thankful I haven't been manic or really depressed.