My mother disowned me over 2 years ago because I said that I would put my disabled twin brothers (17 years old and can’t talk because of their autism disorder) in a group home during the day while I worked if/when they were passed on to me when my parents pass. I mentioned this was in the event I was single and not rich enough to hire a maid.

She freaked out because of her history of her mother putting her in the insane asylum as a teenager (so she thinks all group homes are bad, even though they aren’t) so she disowned me, over what I thought was a perfectly reasonable stance.

Her ultimatum was “You need to get a high paying job and take care of the twins personally instead of abandoning your brothers to the streets or you can no longer be a part of this family”

So I called her on her bluff to control my career path (I wanted to be an artist, she wants me to be a lawyer)

Fast forward 2 years…

Now she wants me back. I mentioned to her how hurtful it was that she disowned me instead of talking it out and how I was going through a rough time/ had a tough childhood which prevented me from wanting to reconnect sooner.

She said that she knew I was always an angry teenager but never noticed that I had any problems bc I was so strong. Her apology was “I’m sorry that you were in so much pain over the past otherwise I wouldn’t have given you that ultimatum.”

To me that didn’t seem like an actual apology. Bc she apologized for how I felt, not what she did.

So I pressed her for a genuine apology. She told me not to rehash the pass and to focus on the future bc it’d make me happier.

Then she went on to tell me how much she loved and misses me, how I’ve been estranged too long and tried to help me find a job in her town even though I’m going to college as a freshman on the opposite coast (USA).

I’m in a situation where I’m living in my car for 2 months until classes start and she offered me $500 to drive to her house.

I do miss her and the rest of my family.

But I’m torn between wanting to believe she’s genuine and thinking she’s probably not. I think that maybe I shouldn’t go.

I guess I’m looking for confirmation that I’m not crazy. It’s very hard not to believe that your mother loves you especially since it felt like we were best friends my whole childhood (Even though it was mostly me being her therapist over her bad childhood, and she refused to acknowledge my problems most of the time as a kid)