I'm wondering if I'm paranoid about a certain situation. Or if I'm just really uncomfortable in the situation, self-conscious, and intimidated.
My boyfriend likes to attend his nieces' and nephews' sports games. I've started attending with him, now that we are living together.
Some background:
He has been separated from his wife for 10 years, and has hired a lawyer because he wants a divorce. She has had her own boyfriend for even longer than 10 years. He has tried numerous times to speak to her about it. She gives him radio silence. The nieces and nephews are her blood (her sister's kids. My boyfriend has a very good relationship w/ that family though. We have gone to family parties where she's there. She completely ignores him and me. It's weird. So I've never formally met her. I do wonder if she is using some kind of strategy of silence regarding the divorce.
My bf and I went to his nephew's basketball game tonight. I left pretty soon into it. Where we were sitting, at first, I felt like she was staring at me, watching me. Though I didn't know where she was. I told him I wanted to switch seats. We did and I noticed she was there, behind us, in the first seats. Then the gym just was really loud and I couldn't deal. I had to leave.
I don't feel comfortable going to all the sports games. Maybe some, but I'm the wrong person for him to look to, to go to these games with. I'm not that person.
I've moved in w/ him. It's a new city. I'm glad I did it, but I need my own circle. My own community. I'd like to join some groups and such, here. Maybe join the gym. On my own.
I care about his nieces and nephews. They're a great family! But I don't see how I can change this. The more I write...the more I think...I'm intimidated by his ex. It's not something I'd like to admit. But there it is.
His sister in law and her husband seem to like my bf more than his ex / her sister. Buy its all just weird / uncomfortable to me. The silent treatment from her is bizarre. I know I can't change anyone's behavior though.
He just finds her annoying, stupid, and doesn't want anything to do with her. But...I feel pretty done trying to fit in with this family (that includes his daughters). I need to take up space and do what feels right for me.
Please, no judgement or shaming me for my life choices. Thanks.
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