To the therapist or here or both?
To me, and obviously I could be wrong, it seems this is your pattern when the therapist says no to some request (both this guy and exmc). You ask for something usually around more contact or info about them, the therapist doesn't respond how you want, and then there is this aftermath - I am wondering if it is more shame around asking and being told no - The asking isn't particularly a wrong thing to do - the stuck part is in how when the answer is no - you get extremely worked up and then go through all of this time and time again.
Or not - just my thoughts.