Ok, first if the money you had set aside for your children was not labeled as such and you both had access to it there is not much you can do about the fact that your wife withdrew these funds for herself. Lesson learned where you must now know your wife WILL take anything she can get access to. Your wife has shown she doesn’t respect or care about boundaries.so if that money was not labeled that it belonged to your children then there isn’t anything you can do about your wife taking it.

With this insurance set up, you should run it by your lawyer before paying any money out of your pocket for HER expenses. Just because her lawyers name is attached doesn’t mean you have to pay those expenses.

Actually that information should be sent to your lawyer. I know you get charged for that but it sends a message to both your wife and her lawyer that you will not be baited or bullied.

Anger is not a bad emotion and it’s good that you are venting it here instead of at your wife. Anger in your case is your self love being compromised. It’s ok to feel it and vent it away from the toxic person who wants you to react to empower themselves.

Your wife is the biggest loser here, she already lost all respect from you and your children. None of you wanted to be around her over the holidays. All of you have been noticing how much calmer and safer it is with her gone from the home. That’s how it is when you remove an alcoholic/addict that has mood swings and unpredictable behaviors that are very narcissistic from your environment.

The word you used is “calm”. It’s that same stress and discomfort to the nervous system that hides under the bed. Yes! Cut the legs off and finally sleep in comfort.