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Old Jan 08, 2024, 05:10 PM
InkyBooky InkyBooky is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2018
Location: U.S.
Posts: 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight View Post
Thanks, Smiley. Yeah, I think it's the mix of both of those--comfort level and attachment style.

Today's session did not make me feel safer, as he said he hoped to do in the email. Just made me feel more distant and like just another number in his pile of clients. (Note to people trying to give reassurance: "You're not unimportant" is not overly helpful.") He had an opening tomorrow (otherwise booked, aside from our appointment Thursday), so will try talking again then. Maybe it's pointless, I don't know.
Just a thought, but have you considered reducing sessions to once or twice per week instead of three times per week? That way you're still holding onto the connection and the good parts of therapy with him, but you're less dependent on him to regulate your sense of "safety".

You seem to be a very high functioning adult (not in crisis). Therefore, with even slightly more time between sessions, you could potentially build your own internal sense of resilience and safety that did not depend soo much on his moods and responses. Sure, his responses would still matter to you and your feelings around them would be great sources of therapeutic fodder... but they wouldn't have to destabilize or shake you in the same way. Hope that makes sense.
Thanks for this!
ArtleyWilkins, Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight