Here is what I believe happened today to me. This week, the legal staff are required to do their annual review with their attorneys in the large conference room where each side shares their goals for the upcoming year. All of the paralegals except for the two legal assistants (me and the other new legal assistant) participated. We were required to complete the evaluation forms for our supervising attorneys to read in preparation for meeting with each of us and a partner to discuss goals. Well, that never happened today.

What I found suspicious: when my two attorneys spent an hour in a partner's office without any warning. I assumed they were talking about me. All of the sudden, 30 minutes before the end of the day, the female attorney and male attorney called me into her office. The male attorney returned from a 3 week vacation yesterday. They impromptly (and might I add, illegally) forced me to sit through a 20 minute "60 day review" that should have happened a month ago. I had to sit and listen to the female attorney project her issues on to me. I wasn't even given the chance to speak.

My 30 day review happend on 11/14
My 60 day review should have happend on 12/14 (it didn't) that is when the male attorney went on vacation for 3 weeks. No preparation for me was given for today's impromptu review. No mention by either attorney that my 60 day review would be late because of the male attorey's vacation.
My 90 day review is supposed to happen 1/14. Today, they both joked, "well, you have 6 days to improve or you're fired." Laughing at me.

Is what they did dirty and underhanded? YES, it is. Illegal? YES, it is. They are attorneys so they think they can act this way. I can go to an employment attorney if I need to, and sue them for discrimination and retaliation if they do fire me.

I know that the only way around ****** bosses is to play possum. To be as neutral as Switzerland.

However, I have to protect my job until I can find another job. And no, I have no allies in the other partners. I don't.

My strategy tomorrow morning is to casually stop by the female attorney's office and ask her to cc' the male attorney and email me their talking points from yesterday's 60 day "review." Then, I will at least have their shenanigans in writing. And, then I can point out to them, that by law, they are required to give me 30 days. I have to find a way to be nonchalant so I make it hard for them to sabotage me more than they already have.

I read the Glassdoor reviews of their former legal assistants who ALL wrote the same thing that I've pointed out here. Unrealistic expectations. Unfair treatment. Sabotage. Undermining. Lying. Manipulating. Lack of transparency.

Today, one of their former legal assistants who worked for them for 4 years got a new job and they were without ANY legal assistants until they hired me (about 6 months). So, they BEGGED her to work at night to do legal assistant work to help them out (and then they hired me and a month later, hired the second legal assistant). I have her phone number. I can always apply at her company (no legal assistant jobs open, just administrative jobs, so fine by me). I can use her as a reference. So that is helpful. She has no loyalty to them, I have to hope.

I am trying to stay strategic b/c as we all know, it's much easier to get a job when you have a job. I won't use either attorney as a reference if I do get any interviews. I will need to figure out other references and explain that I can't use anyone at my current law firm as a job reference b/c they don't know I'm looking.

Does anyone have any helpful advice at all? What is the best way to outsmart these two attorneys tomorrow with my email about their illegal 60 day review? My gut feeling tells me, if they had planned to keep me around for the year, I would have been invited to the large conference room to meet with them and a partner to review the stupid 5 page self-evaluation and goals I have, as part of incentive to stay there. I feel like they are strategizing to get me fired.

Or maybe I just should work for myself and stop working in traditional workspaces. Maybe I need to find multiple one-person type jobs where I can be my own boss and make money that way. Even if I am fortunate enough to find anothe job, there will still be toxic people at that job. I can't escape toxic people. They are everywhere. And therein lies the rub, as the bard Shakespeare would say.