Yea, that would be difficult if stuff like that was kept from me. I think it would pop huge red flags for me.

I'm sorry you are struggling with distancing yourself from this person. Maybe you can turn the ringer off on your phone so you don't know when it rings? Then you could check your messages once a day and make any other necessary call backs to other people/businesses.

As far as trust issues, I think that takes time. Do you have a therapist that you can talk things over with?