Quote:
Originally Posted by AppleLime
aw thank you for reading my message I really appreciate it and twice.  And your time reading it.
Yeah Im asking if it's normal to feel exhausted after EMDR where as T2 says no, I shouldn't feel exhausted or distressed. And I begin to wonder because of my pervious experience with T1 and I was forgetful after EMDR sessions and distress and had unwanted memories coming in. If T1 didn't know what she was doing.
One thing maybe you could ask me. You know how I mention in my message how T2 printed the 6 pages of my email and take it into my session and turn the pages and counted them and the way they went on about it. Is that normal therapy behaviour?
I have shorten my emails quit dramatically for my T2 now. But they don't reply. So I feel all anxious and uncertain and not supported.
Where as previously with my T1 she always replied to my emails and never complain how long they were. Well I never knew how long they actually were.
is that normal of T2? |
I can't comment on EMDR. But I'm also someone who used to send very long emails to my former therapist. I don't know that I realized quite how long they were at the time. And we had a couple conflicts over it, as she generally wouldn't respond and also said how my emails kept "getting longer and longer." And how she had to give equal time to all clients (even though she also said that most don't email). It really hurt. Especially as she waited until it was an issue to say something about it.
My current therapist, who I've been seeing for around 6 years now (saw previous therapist for 6), he always responds to emails, but will charge for them if it takes him more than 15 minutes to read and reply (he suspended that during the first year and a half of the pandemic). It was difficult for me for a long time.
But I admit that it has also trained me to think about how often I want to email and also how much information I really need to give in an email (vs. telling him next session). And also, after a few replies where he didn't respond to the most important part of my email, it made me realize I needed to think about what I really wanted to convey and get back. To say something like, "I just want a little support right about [issue x] right now."
To clarify, I also would have been hurt by my therapist doing what yours did, showing the 6 pages. But T's deal with email differently. Some don't allow it at all. Some will allow for sending it, and they'll confirm receipt, but not reply. Others will give a response. Some will charge for it.
Mine has said the reason he charges (and he's been quite lenient in that since the pandemic) is so that he won't become resentful of emails, that if he is getting paid for them, they're part of his job. And that it's not like I'm doing anything "bad" if I send one that leads to a charge--it just means that it's crossed that financial threshold. As in, he won't be annoyed with me or anything. (Incidentally, he's charged me for maybe 15 emails over 6 years--he's given me lots of free replies.)
I would have a discussion with your therapist about emails, what their policies are. Whether they'll read and reply. Read and not reply (maybe confirming receipt). Reply only if you request it. Or something else.