Quote:
Originally Posted by Tart Cherry Jam
I am confused, seeing that you are in India, why you are referring to the Bible? But you wrote "Not only that, cultural and religious differences would complicate things. " so are you in a religious minority in India? What faith does the young gentleman belong to?
Overall, your post gives the impression of a person who has read too many pop psychology books / websites / articles etc. for her own good and who does not trust her instincts and judgment and instead overanalyzes everything that happens from the vantage point of what she gleaned from those sources.
The only thing that is worrisome about the whole affair is that you felt suicidal. Was it a fleeting feeling? How are you feeling now?
You wrote: "I read, in order to break a soul tie". What is a soul tie in your book? Can you explain?
You signed the post with "Young and lost." and you indeed are, but you also appear very confused. I think the path forward for you is to learn to trust yourself and demote the importance of pop psychology sources and the Bible and everything else external in your environment. By the way, does the therapist know that you felt suicidal? You wrote that the therapist told you that sharing is intimacy. Well, obviously it is, so at least the therapist is on target there; can the therapist also assist with dealing with suicidal feelings?
How often do you feel suicidal? Have you felt suicidal outside of this incident? You wrote about feeling suicidal in a very matter-of-factly manner, suggesting that this is a repeat occurrence with you. I hope you stay safe. Your exploration of the world as you are describing it is clearly safe, but feeling suicidal can lead to unsafe outcomes.
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I am referring to the Bible since I am a Protestant and he is a Hindu. Yes, Christianity is a minority in India. I am feeling sad that I have overinformed myself. Up to a certain extent it has helped me, since I realized feeling suicidal was triggered by the thought of possibly losing the friendship, it was a flashback. Now I have reached a little stability. My therapist told me sometimes I overanalyze to feel safer.
According to the article, a soul tie is formed due to sexual or romantic intimacy, which helps married people stay together. But even cuddling can cause it to form. It said that the Bible says to stay away from such things, and I will have to cut him off in order to break the soul tie. (I will not do that, I intend to deal with it more maturely this time.) I felt suicidal because breaking this friendship would cause me pain. I had already lost contact with two other friends. It felt as if I was different from him, as though he was wrong and I would be wrong by being with him. I understand I have catastrophized this though. I have therapy tomorrow, and she may ask what happened between me and him since she knows I met him. She may be disappointed in me, I'll try to tell her, though I feel a little hesitant to tell her. I will mention though, that the idea of losing his friendship made me feel suicidal. This is the first time I am bringing it up though, she asked if I felt this way earlier, (seeing her since a month.) So I will find out how good she is with such feelings. I only feel suicidal if I have something trigger it. For example, when you said I seem to have read too many psychology books, etc. for my own good and that I do not trust my instincts and judgment, and that I overanalyze everything, I felt triggered, I dissociated and wondered what the point of it all is. But since I knew it was a reaction to criticism, I kept reminding myself that. I have felt this way before, although after a long time. Been many months now.