I think it is a common story, yes Gasplessy. Regretting the past is quite common. I have things in my past, things I did, that I wish never happened - evils! Even some things I did as a child(!) that still make me have ill-feeling toward myself. A mental health professional might say that it's unresolved issues but to me there's nothing to resolve: what happened, happened, and I should feel bad about it - I just accept it, warts and all - because it would be weird to feel happy, or to feel nothing about it. And I look at other people and I know I'm not unique. People who judge you for past deeds? - well, lets break down their lives and have a gander shall we? Anyway, sending you great support Gasplessy, I know you've been through a lot