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Originally Posted by assortedfortune
Now I'm waking up at 4pm. I still slightly exercise and i've been trying to eat better. But I feel like I'm in a horrible lull right now. I don't have many friends to talk to about this.
I also keep falling into anxiety-loops replaying scenarios in my head. Like, maybe I was being too pushy with physical touch. Or my least favorite one, maybe my appearance and looks just wasn't what she wanted in her life. She knew what I looked like, so she should have known I was a little hefty. Although my recent photos might not have given her that impression and it wasn't until we met did she realize she wasn't attracted to me. But, we were both asexual and I don't think physical attraction matters to her much.
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I have no experience with asexual or aromantic relationships but do know a lot about depression. Waking up at 4PM is a symptom of depressive hypersomnia. Replaying loops in your mind is a symptom of depressive rumination.
The general psychiatric advice about such situations is to force yourself to get up from your bed in the morning and then, even if you fall asleep on the couch for several hours after doing something in the morning, it is better than staying in bed until 4PM. Just get up and do some semblance of a morning routine.
But I know it is much easier said than done.
Another typical advice is to get outdoor light in the morning, without sunglasses. I know for me it would not work, but for a lot of folks it works. It is supposed to be better both for the mood and for the circadian rhythms. Maybe try it? At least it would not hurt to try and it is not difficult or expensive but accessible.
Good that you are continuing to exercise a little. How exactly do you exercise?